[Well, he sure walked into that one. Why did he say that? Why did he say it like that? What's wrong with him?!]
It's definitely stupid. It's so, so stupid...
[But he squeezes Min's hand in return. The gesture helps ground him and remind him Min's there. Talking about it feels so much harder, like he's erased any progress he made in that regard.
Saying it out loud is terrifying. It means letting Min know he worries about this kind of thing even occasionally and revealing the horrible truth - that he's clingy and annoying and holding him back--
--and, suddenly he knows exactly how to ease into it.]
It's. It's like a bad thought, almost?
[They've talked about that before, about how they don't necessarily represent the truth of the situation, or what you're really like as a person.]
Like, usually it isn't a thing. And even when it comes up usually I can just like, squish it down and ignore it and move on? Because I... [He heaves a deep, frustrated sigh.] Like, I know better. But...I keep freaking out today anyway. Like, super freaking out, like it's end of the freaking world! Like-- like I'm dying or something, I don't get it!
[Which is, in Ryan's opinion, stupid as hell. He's obviously not dying, so why does the world feel like it's been on fire for the last several hours?!]
no subject
It's definitely stupid. It's so, so stupid...
[But he squeezes Min's hand in return. The gesture helps ground him and remind him Min's there. Talking about it feels so much harder, like he's erased any progress he made in that regard.
Saying it out loud is terrifying. It means letting Min know he worries about this kind of thing even occasionally and revealing the horrible truth - that he's clingy and annoying and holding him back--
--and, suddenly he knows exactly how to ease into it.]
It's. It's like a bad thought, almost?
[They've talked about that before, about how they don't necessarily represent the truth of the situation, or what you're really like as a person.]
Like, usually it isn't a thing. And even when it comes up usually I can just like, squish it down and ignore it and move on? Because I... [He heaves a deep, frustrated sigh.] Like, I know better. But...I keep freaking out today anyway. Like, super freaking out, like it's end of the freaking world! Like-- like I'm dying or something, I don't get it!
[Which is, in Ryan's opinion, stupid as hell. He's obviously not dying, so why does the world feel like it's been on fire for the last several hours?!]